Thoughts and Words Ill-Sorted

Erin

The kids and I just got back from a birthday party.  We had a great time, but only now–now that I am no longer trying to corral my kids in a public space while smiling–am I finally understanding two puzzling conversations.

When I was talking with two fathers of the 5yo set, both guys asked several questions about my husband (who is currently in another state).  Only now does it occur to me to want to ask, “What makes you think I have a husband?”  I’m glad that didn’t occur to me earlier, since it would be good to be cordial, at least 🙂

Both guys also asked what my husband did for a living.  When I told them he recently started teaching at Asbury, they were clearly confused, since I told them we moved here three years ago.  Only now does it dawn on me that they hadn’t realized I have been working here for three years.  Sigh.  I guess it’s a sign of my warm and welcoming department that it’s been quite a while since I’ve had to be alert for stay-at-home-parent assumptions in ordinary conversation.  I’m glad I wasn’t alert earlier today, since I would have been able to clear up the confusion then and there, but I might have lost a new acquaintance or two in the process.

Erin

When I’m dropping Nathaniel off at school today, he mentions he has a new teacher who’s living in the dorms.

“Oh, so she’s a student at Asbury?”

“Yeah.  She’s learning stuff . . . like how many angels dance on a pin.”

Now I’m paying attention.  “Did she say that?”

“Nope.  Nobody said that.  Mom, how many angels can dance on the head of a pin?”

(I think about whether to deflate this vision of medieval theological debates, since my resident medievalist has assured me it’s absolute fiction, but decide against it) “Honey, God hasn’t told us just how big angels are.”

“Maybe you should ask Google, Mom.  Google will know.”

!!!

Erin

“You were just slurring words together.”

Apparently I don’t even need drug or alcohol impairment.  I get in my own way just by talking fast and being a bit distracted.

Erin

For his birthday, Nathaniel got to pick the menu.  Strawberry shortcake topped his list, followed by chopped veggies (he particularly wanted snap peas) and hummus.  I’m wondering if our kids should always plan our meals: two equally-sized bowls of veggies and dessert sounds great!

“So, Nathaniel, what is so great about turning five?”

“You get harder worksheets.”

Really, kiddo?  “Anything else?”

“You’re closer to six.”

Well, okay.  “Anything else?”

“You get pencils.  From school.”

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is five in a nutshell, from its newest member.

Erin

Sydney looked to be working on the playground (he’s adding monkey bars), Katherine made a phone out of a wooden block, and Nathaniel was thrilled to find something he could use as a hammer, “Just like Dada’s.”

Erin

Yes, Sydney is already raring to go with this year’s garden.  Yes, it’s only early February.  But it was also 50 degrees today and Katherine ended our morning hike with her jackets tied around her waist.  So you can see why the poor man is tortured!

Erin

Katherine: “I may have to stay home from school on Monday for no reason because of the snowstorm.”

I see she’s already got Kentucky nailed.

Sydney

Erin