When Sydney and I were finishing up our time at Yale, it was a rather rough season. On top of writing up theses (and Sydney’s fear that dating me would result in him failing his classes), riding out the grad school process, and, oh yes, school, we had to work through an additional problem:
“It’s spring. It’s time for me to be out planting. I want a garden. Why do I have to be inside, writing a stupid thesis, when I could be outside, making good use of this beautiful weather? Can I leave now?”
Sydney offered me a string of complaints along these lines every day or two . . . or several times in an afternoon, if he was sitting in front of his computer, having to work on history or philosophy. Very early in our relationship I took on the dragon-lady role – I couldn’t believe that I had to tell a grown man “I’m sorry, but I think the answer is no.”
When we married and moved to Ithaca, I thought all would be well. Sydney got interested in the garden options around here, and soon had a whole set of plots from one organization, another near the lake, and a tiny plot at home. Gardening is a lot of work, but I thought I would then have a happy man.
Nope: a) I should have known that I wouldn’t have a gardener on my hands, but a farmer who was constantly worried about his plants and spouting pessimistic predictions about their future b) Sydney immediately started on a new set of pleas:
“Building fences is so draining and frustrating. It’s also horrible having neighboring gardeners who allow their dogs to walk through my plot and who think, apparently, that weeds, and not vegetable, are what you grow in a garden. Can I buy land?”
For the past year Sydney has taken every opportunity to announce “I want LAND,” financial matters and the mobile academic life notwithstanding. Don’t get me wrong: I grew up in the Midwest, and before leaving for college had called the same 10-mile area “home” for my entire life. I was surrounded by cornfields and knew all about being rooted. But this man has me beat.
Erin
Alan Schmierer
Totally incredible! Maybe if you let him buy land, he will produce enough organic vegetables on that farm to pay for it…
Ha! Yeah, he said once he had a garden our grocery bill would go down considerably. I have to say, I’m still waiting for it, despite the fact that we have a freezer full of frozen vegetables. If it worked, our appetites have increased to absorb the difference!
Erin